Harry Potter in Times Square
by lilangemon2433
Summary: Harry Potter has bad luck and goes to Times Square. Sorry if I offend anyone in this story, it's just I used all the stereotypes that other people give to New York City and made fun of them. Anyway, this is my favorite fic that I ever wrote and you should


Harry Potter in Times Square  
by lilangemon2433  
  
AN: Oh, humbug, I'm on another story again. Let's see, this story is funny, blah, blah blah. I'm paid too little for this. As a matter of fact, I'm the most important part of lilangemon's stories. I'm leaving. Oh, bye the way, before I leave, just read this story.   
  
AN2: Okay, since he's gone, I'll be the new and improved Author's Note. Enjoy Harry Potter in Times Square. Harry Potter's having bad luck with floo powder, and Hermione and Ron were too dazed to notice that they missed their fireplace. This is the summer after Harry, Ron and Hermione leave the school. Rated PG-13 for a reason...  
  
We join our friends in the dining hall, waiting to receive their morning mail.  
  
Ron: Blimey, Harry, a package for me, and a letter.  
  
Dear Ronald and Ginny,  
  
Sorry I can't make it to your graduation ceremony Ron, but Arthur's been caught bewitching muggle items. Now my friends bear-skin rug roars every-time you step on it. So, I'll have to work at Gringotts with your brother till I can get some money.  
  
With love,  
Mum  
  
P.S. That package isn't a gift Ron, it's the floo powder you and Ginny need to get out of Hogwarts and back home after graduation.  
  
Ron: Dammit, mum never thinks of me.  
  
Hermione: Maybe it's because you did so horribly on your report card. Look, you got a B+ Ron, a B+, my god, next you'll be getting a B... what the, I got a B, I got a B in potions. Ah, I wanna kill myself.  
  
Ron: Hermione, what are you talking about, you got an A.  
  
Hermione: hmmm, you're right, it is an A.  
  
Harry: How could you confuse an A with a B Hermione?  
  
Hermione: I dunno, it's just, well, Professor Trelawney.  
  
Ron: Oh, you fancy another teacher. (Harry and Ron laugh histerically, Hermione blushes)  
  
Hermione: No, you bloody git, this one's different. She said that we will find out a very weird secret, one not meant to be shared with us. We shall go to an odd, strange place, crummy during the day but at night, spectacular. And if we wander we will find. Then Professor Trelawney paused a bit and said WB.  
  
Harry: What the heck does WB mean?  
  
Hermione: I dunno, but those two words scared the heck out of me.  
  
Ron: Oh, besides Hermione, I thought you didn't believe in that Divination mumbo jumbo.  
  
Hermione: You're right, but this one had nothing to do with Harry dying, and those visions usually come true.  
  
Ron: Maybe you're right. But let's not worry about this (Ron kisses Hermione on cheek, Hermione kisses back)  
  
Harry: Now, we'd better get going to the burrow. Get Ginny Ron.  
  
Ron: Alright (Ron gets Ginny, and they head to the common room)  
  
All: The Burrow (throw floo powder in and whiz through portal)  
  
Ron: Doesn't all this whizzing turn you on Hermione?  
  
Hermione: Well, maybe a bit.  
  
Ron: Well then, come here. (Ron and Hermione start making out, while Harry is too dizzy to notice anything)  
  
Ginny: Ron?  
  
Ron: Hold on Ginny.  
  
Ginny: Um.. Ron?  
  
Ron: Hold on Ginny! Can't you see I'm busy?!  
  
Ginny: Bye Ron! (Ginny jumps out)  
  
Ron: Bye Ginny! (Waits five seconds) Bye Ginny?  
  
Hermione: Oh no, we were too busy making out, we missed the stop.  
  
Ron: Harry, you still here?  
  
Harry: Ugh, are we at the burrow?  
  
Hermione: No we missed our stop, so we'll get off in a while.  
  
(Get out and end up on busy streets)  
  
Harry: Where... where are we?  
  
Hermione: Trelawney's vision! It's.. it's  
  
Ron: Real!  
  
Man: Hey man, you must be that brown haired kid we smoked last week, get back in, we is startin to get cold.  
  
HArry: Who in the bloody hell are you?  
  
Man: My name is, it doesn't matter what my name is, all that matters is if you can smell what the Rock is cooking.  
  
Hermione: Rocks can't cook  
  
Ron: Let's get out of here, these people are mental.  
  
Hermione: Um.. excuse me sir.  
  
Man: Si?  
  
Ron: He's speaking parseltongue... it's a death eater.  
  
Hermione: No, stupid! He's speaking spanish. Donde estamos?  
  
Man: Estamos en Times Square.  
  
Harry: Where's that?  
  
Hermione: Donde esta Times Square?  
  
Man: Times Square esta en la ciudad de Nueva York.  
  
Hermione: We're in the U.S. We're in New York City, the city of lights.  
  
AN2: Yes, the young heroes ended up in Times Square. They've already met wrestling fans and spanish people. Who will they meet next? Read on and find out.  
  
Lady: Hey there honey!  
  
Harry: Are you talking to me?  
  
Lady: Yeah hun, I can give you the time of your life  
  
Hermione: I think it's one of those prostitutes mum told me about.  
  
Ron: Do you realize who he is, he's the great Harry Potter!  
  
Lady: Yeah, well he can Pot his Harry right in my...  
  
Hermione: Stupify!  
  
(Lady starts having a seizure)  
  
Harry: We have to get out of here, someplace where it's safe. Where there are alot of people! Let's go over there!  
  
(Harry points over to the MTV building, where Total Request Live is airing)  
  
Hermione: What are these people doing?  
  
Ron: Yeah, and who in the bloddy hell are the Backstreet Boys? Those girls over there are holding up signs that say "Backstreet Boys rule!"  
  
Hermione: You think they might be like Voldemort? Leaders of a band of mesmerized zombies?  
  
Harry: Let's not take any chances! Dormio!  
  
(The whole crowd falls asleep)  
  
Carson Daily: I think that's... wait.'. is that, it's Harry Potter, let's bring him up.  
  
(Harry, Ron and Hermione appear in the building)  
  
Carson: Now Harry, you can request any video since you're famous, you can request any video, and all of the U.S will see it.  
  
Harry: Mamma Mia by ABBA  
  
Carson: DOn't you mean the A Teens?  
  
Harry: No, I mean ABBA!  
  
Carson: But... ABBA sucks!  
  
Ron: What.. you and your crappy show suck. Avada Kedarva  
  
(Carson Daily dies)  
  
Ron: Let's get the hell out of here!  
  
(Harry, Ron, Hermione start wandering, when they see someone preaching)  
  
Person: The end is near... I can feel it... all you mortals are doomed.  
  
Hermione: Do you think it's...  
  
Ron: It can't be  
  
Harry: It is.. it's a death eater. Stupify!  
  
(Man falls over and has a seizure)  
  
Harry: Let's leave, fast!  
  
AN2: And so, Harry and the gang, left, and they were wandering, until they came across a large building, with a startling picture on the top.  
  
Hermione: Harry, doesn't that kid look like you.  
  
Ron: it kinda does... Harry, that is you!  
  
Harry: No it's not... what the bloody hell, it is me! And look, that sign. It says.  
  
Hermione: WB! Professor Trelawney's vision. She was right!  
  
Ron: Let's go inside  
  
(Step inside and go to Harry Potter section)  
  
Hermione: Look at all this. It's a picture of me and Ron... and don't look like that.  
  
Ron: Look at this... it appears to be four books on our years at Hogwarts. Some person named J.K Rowling has been stalking us.  
  
Harry: Bean bag snitches, puzzles, jelly beans, figurines, all the muggles are being exposed to magic. (Harry faints)  
  
Ron: Harry, are you okay?  
  
Hermione: Harry's... dead.  
  
Ron: He died of shock. Finally, Professor Trelawney predicted his death  
  
Hermione: Look, a burning trash can, and we have just enough floo powder to get home. Let's go!  
  
AN2: And so, Ron and Hermione went to the Burrow, went home and in 10 years, they got married and had a son and a daughter named Harry and Wendy.  
  
The End.  
  
lilangemon2433: Yay, it's over. That was sooo fun. I apologize if i offended anyone.  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  



End file.
